What I learned at the DMV

Not me, I can't take credit for this lovely list.
A friend of mine, who is a bit of a curmudgeon but who has a keen eye for the absurd, sent this to me.

I had to go to the DMV to renew my license this year and did you know?

1) You are required to stop at a red light!

2) At 8 sided red signs that read STOP, you are required to stop.

3) You are not allowed to drive down a sidewalk.

4) Right of way rules means that the car on the right has the right-of-way even if they are turning left.

5) If slowing or stopping your car will prevent an accident, it is saver to use the brakes than honk the horn.

6) When merging onto the freeway the freeway traffic has the right of way.

7) The flashing lights on the back of a vehicle indicate a plan to turn in the direction of the flashing light. Emergency signals do not mean that you can choose at the last second.

8) If you are blind you are not allowed to drive faster than the speed limit.

9) Parking at colored curbs is not racist.

10) Do not open the driver’s side door unless it is safe to do so.

11) Don’t make gestures to other drivers.

12) If you drive faster than other traffic you will have to keep passing other cars.

13) You must use your headlights if it is dark out.

14) If you are stopped by a police officer hang up your cell phone and turn off the radio.

15) You can not be a designated driver unless there are at least 2 people in the car.

I hope that this information helps you in your day to day driving. My trip to the DMV went really well. I spent 3 hours and managed to get my picture taken for a new license. I did find a California Driver Handbook written in English of all things and read it several times as I was waiting. The people at the DMV were personable and apparently received a 15% raise this year. Most of the people at the DMV were wearing SEIU polo shirts. Some may have had an ACORN for distinguished service on their lapel. I didn’t actually see this.